1-800-240-9894 shelter@fvps.ca

About Violence

Teen Dating Violence is a pattern of actions and attitudes in dating relationships where one person makes another person feel powerless, controlled, and scared.

MYTH: Boys are never victims of dating violence. They can only be the abusers. (click to open)

FACT: Both boys and girls can be abused in their relationship. It is also important to know that both girls and boys can also be abusive but the WAYS they abuse can often be different.

  • Girls are more likely to do things such as slap, kick or punch their partners, be emotionally abusive and threaten to hurt themselves in a breakup.
  • Boys are more likely to be physically and sexually abusive, or cause injuries from their abuse

MYTH: If you love someone enough, you can change his or her abusive behavior.

FACT: You are not responsible for the behaviour of an abusive partner. Often reinforced by films, music, and the rest of the media, girls, most often are socialized to believe that they can, and must, transform all that is wrong in a relationship. Instead, we need to recognize that only those who help themselves will be transformed. Behaviour is a choice and you are not to blame for someone else’s violent or abusive behaviour.

MYTH: People who are abusive under the influence of drugs or alcohol are not responsible for their actions.

FACT: Violence is a choice, and there are better choices. Drugs and alcohol are excuses for abusive behaviour and they lower your inhibitions. If a person who is abusive is using either drugs and/or alcohol, they have 2 separate and serious problems. Being on drugs or alcohol does NOT relieve an abusive partner of responsibility for his or her own behaviour.
No person should make you feel controlled and scared in a way that is:

Did this make you think about your relationship?

It’s worth asking some questions about what happens in YOUR relationship.

in youth
report knowing a friend or peer who has been physically abused by their partner.